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Thursday, October 04, 2012

October is Anti-Bullying Month!

We tend to think of bullying as the kind of thing that kids go through at school.

I think at one time or another we’ve all had to go through the torture and torment of being a bit “different”.  And certainly when you are in the public eye, that also can make you a target for the unkindnesses of others who somehow get something out of picking others apart.

Bullying is also something that is running rampant on the internet ---- as we forget to put our filters on, both with with we say, how we reply, and how we react to things that are said to us. 

I just think this is such an amazing month for awareness after dealing with the aftermath of very hurtful unfounded emails.  What makes a person think they HAVE to send an email to anyone with a bullying tone?

By now I’m sure you’ve heard of the news anchor in Wisconsin who was bullied by email because of her weight.  The email sent to her was SO condescending and so hurtful ---and had NOTHING to do with how she does her job.  Her response stands for itself.  I’d like to play it back for you here, it really IS worth the watch, and putting into practice:


There are those that lead in the bullying --- and then there are those who jump on the bandwagon in the aftermath and continue to peck.  ((We've all heard the "Kick them when they're down" phrase))

Let’s not do this to each other.  We are better than this.

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and soul searching and I *KNOW* there is room for improvement in my life, but again ----it is not anyone’s business to tell me so, nor to tell me what to improve.  Before you point out the flaws in my character, please take inventory of your own.

This morning I’m out the door early.  Shamu has an appointment for a tune-up.  I’ve also got to pick the BEST 4 quilts from String Fling to send to Kansas City Star for Quilt Market!

If you could choose only 4 --- which 4 would they be?  Help me choose!  I want the best 4 to promote my book.

Which are your favorites?

63 comments:

  1. Thank you so much for sharing the video from WI! I am going to share it on facebook as well. I've seen so many blog posts from so many different people on this subject lately, it sad to think that the fact that someone can't see us allows some to do this hurtful thing. Makes me glad I don't have thousands of folks following my blog!

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  2. Zuckerwatte, Blue Skies, Jamestown Landing, and Tulip Fields. Those are all on my "to do" list.

    I'm bullied about my weight too. I try not to let it bother me. I think that people who bully have problems in their own lives and just take it out on others.

    Have a great day Bonnie!

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  3. I love the talkin turkey quilt. That is one of my favorites. Watched you last evening on CAM but can you believe it, I fell asleep with sewing in hand. I've never done that before. It's a wonder I didn't stab my self!
    Gail in Verona

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  4. Thank you for posting this entry today. Being a male quilter and knitter, I have be subjected to some nasty looks and comments. At first, it was hard and I generally would hide what I was doing and enjoying. Then one day, I decided to knit on a long flight to Europe. It was both freeing and enlightening. I was able to help myself by not letting others hold me back. Not sure if you would call what I faced bullying but it was just that in my mind. It made me feel different and uncomfortable. Bullying on any level needs to be stopped, period!

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    1. Glenn, do you remember Rosie Greer? He was a famous football player years ago. He was also a large physical man, one who got some razzing I am sure because he loved to do needle point. If you enjoy doing it, enjoy the creating process, go for it. No one else has the right to put you in their "box" of what they think someone should be. And as a side note, many men would love to be as creative as they see some of us quilters be. Be blessed my quilty friend.
      Faye in Maine

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    2. I think men who employ and enjoy the fabric arts are wonderful, creative and fun to be around. Since I've been quilting my husband has taken an interest in how fabric is "constructed" (woven) ... must be the engineer in him ;-) Glad you rose about the small people who made remarks or gave comments ... enjoy YOUR life doing what makes YOU happy. Good for you!

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    3. Don't care about those nasty looks and comments... and take a look at the faces of those who are smiling...
      I guess there are a lot of people who don't dare to do things in public because of others - and those are the ones who smile at you, who admire you for maybe knitting in public.
      I always have been "the odd one" and I can tell a long story about being bullied. It still hurts, but it doesn't hold me back doing the things I love - because the positive aspects always outhweigh the negative ones.
      I'm 29 and I'm sewing hexagons in public. I draw quilting patterns in my sketchbook wherever I can. I don't care about the ones that are about my age who are just interested in the latest high heels or the best make up... but I love to see the smiles on some peoples faces... and even more I love the fact that creativity (sewing) is my freedom <3

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    4. WOW, thanks so much for the kind words of support. I'm happily quilting and knitting in all sorts of places with little concern of how it's perceived.

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    5. Hi Glenn, you keep doing what you love!!!

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    6. I like RRCB! Although not popular right now, I remember bullying being quite common in my childhood, but I am the second one of five with 3 younger brothers. As I recall bullying was frowned upon but no rules about 0 tolerance were mandated. In a way, I think bullying thickens one's skin which is needed in this world no matter what the times. I know, I know it's not PC, but where has PC gotten us anyway? BTW, I always sign my posts. I don't bully.

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  5. I posted this video yesterday.
    For quilts:
    Definitely Orca Bay
    Pineapple Crazy
    Talkin Turkey
    Roll Roll Cotton Boll
    Paula in KY

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  6. My favorites to do yet are Talkin Turkey and "Cotton Candy" and my two favs that I have done are Roll Roll Cotton Bohl and Orca Bay. Have a good one. Hope Shamu comes home all refreshed. What did you decide to take to work on at the dealership? Will wait to see.

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  7. Thanks for the video Bonnie, this lady hit the nail on the head!
    I personally like Orca Bay, Jamestown Landing, Roll Roll Cotton Bole and Talkin' Turkey. What ever you choose, they will be inspiration to all who view them to get out those scraps and get to work!!
    Have a great Thursday.
    Faye in Maine

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  8. Peffernuese is my favorite.

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  9. I love that she is from WI....don't mess with us cheese heads!

    I don't have my String Fling in front of me, but I love RRCB, and the one the is a huge star made of strings with a red background. I can't wait to make that one! They are all great, so whatever you send will be awesome!

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  10. I like them all how about Jamestown Landing, Orca Bay, Pineapple Crazy, and Talking Turkey

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  11. My 4 favorites from this book are: Jamestown Landing, Pineapple Crazy, Talkin Turkey, and Santa Fe String Star. Can't wait to see which ones that you choose.
    Kristie

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  12. Talking Turkey, Jamestown Landing, Orca Bay and Pineapple Crazy.

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  13. I have a 1901 (according to singer) hand crank machine. The serial #P260829. Would someone please recommend a website, book or something to tell me about this machine. I have had it since 2004/05 from an antique mall. I got it more as a decrative piece but since I've been reading and following here I want to know more about it and how it works. I have the bobbin cae and 3 bobbins. The bobbin case is out of the machine and when I turn the handle everything moves free. I would like to know how to thread the bobbin and insert the bobbin into the case, then into the machine.
    Thanks, any and all help will be appreciated.
    Have a blessed day!

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    Replies
    1. Shelia, you might try Relics. It's a website with sewing machine manuals to download or get a hard copy in the mail with free shipping. www.tias.com/stores/relics/ or www.sewing-machine-manuals.com should get you to the Relics website. My husband brings home unusual machines from auctions and so far we have been able to find a book for each one on this website.

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    2. Thank you very much, Claudia.

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  14. Good morning! What a hard choice, I love them all. My favorites are
    Talkin Turkey
    Pineapple Crazy
    Pfefferneuse
    Orca Bay
    Zuckerwatte
    Roll Roll, Cotton Boll
    told you it was too hard to choose!
    Hugs, Vanya

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  15. I vote for Zuckerwatte, Talkin' Turkey, Orca Bay, and Jamestown Landing. At least those are my top 4 right now....I'm just saying....I love your quilts and I love your scrappin' style!

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  16. definitely the turkey one! cannot beat red and cream scraps to the max!

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  17. Talkin Turkey, Orca Bay, and Roll Roll Cotton Boll for sure!

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  18. Jamestown Landing, Tulip Fields, talking Turkey, RRCB, Pineapple Crazy,.... oh heck, I love all of them! LOL! I LOVE the directions at a glance tht is in this book!

    Good for that anchor and good for you for standing up yourself. I know it's hard to be different, and I watched my son struggle with it all through school... and my daughters too were set apart because of their brother. If people could just engage their brain (and heart) before speaking the world would be a better place for everyone.


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  19. Love the video and she spoke so eloquently on the subject.
    Love ALL the quilts in your new book (got it the day after my anniversary - you are amazing with the quick delivery Bonnie!) but Jamestown Landing is my favorite. Any that you choose would look amazing in the booth.

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  20. Talkin' Turkey!, Roll Roll, Cotton Boll, Pfefferneuse and Blue Skies (and Jamestown Landing and Zuckerwatte); these are the ones on my "to-do someday list" right now. Of course, tomorrow the list may change to all the ones I didn't list today.

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  21. Thank you Bonnie for sharing the video and your own comments on this issue of bullying. My 8 yr.old grandaughter is overweight and has suffered from taunting in school several times. God bless her little best friend who stood up for her and told the others "You stop being unkind to Alex..she is my friend and I love her just the way she is?" Oh, if there were only more sweet little Samantha's in all our lives the world would be such a better place. I have battled with weight issues my entire life so I can sympathize with the hurt from that email this reported suffered. May God bless her for her courage to speak out and use this opportunity as a teaching tool.

    Talking Turkey, Orca Bay, Jamestown Landing and Cotton Candy are my 4 choices! I love them all, but those are my faves!

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  22. I've got the book right here by my machine. Tulip Fields is the next on my Bonnie list, then pineapple Crazy, Talkin Turkey, Jamestown Landing. Just remember that I've made the Mystery ones so they are not on my list for that reason only. This is my favorite book so far. Looking forward to the next one.

    Judy

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  23. Anonymous9:06 AM EDT

    Kindness starts in our own heart. TEACH and PRACTICE kindness. It can spread too. Remember those 'Random acts of kindness" we have all heard of.

    Sadly enough the Internet has unleashed the inner demons in far too many people. For this, please use the delete key ... and move on. We all have seen what being a bully aka being mean, can do.

    MANYHUGSTOALL
    JulieinTN

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  24. got to agree with the ladies above me; my faves are also Jamestown Landing, Orca Bay, Pineapple Crazy, and Talkin' Turkey.

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  25. Blue skies, orca bay, roll roll cotton boll, and tulip fields--it;s a good variety of color, too.

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  26. Pineapple Crazy,Zuckerwatte, Jamestown LandingPfefferneuse

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  27. Anonymous9:21 AM EDT

    Dang! Just 4?

    Orca Bay
    Roll, Roll Cotton Boll
    Talkin' Turkey
    Pineapple Crazy

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  28. Talkin' Turkey
    Jamestown landing
    Santa Fe String Star
    Pineapple crazy
    Altho i love others too, these would show how much variation in design one can get in String Quilts.
    Thanks for posting the video; I seen references to it, but not the clip itself. I love the comment above "to think with our..."hearts." Thanks again! B

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  29. Blue Skies, Jamestown Landing, Orca Bay and Pineapple Crazy are my absolute favorites from your book. I'm still working on my Orca Bay and I love your pattern!

    And there is one more thing that I love:
    I love your blog the way it is.

    There will always be things that one person does not like - there have been issues in the past and there will be in the future.
    But you, Bonnie, the person who inspires hundreds or even thousands of readers each and every day, you know that an enormous majority of your readers loves your blog the way it is.
    Those who want to hurt you are probably only jealous that they are not like you...

    Thanks for all the inspiration you give to all of us each and every day!

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  30. I couldn't pick 4 but I am sure what ever you send will be a hit.

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  31. RRCB, Jamestown Landing, Ocra Bay and Talking Turkey.

    Our preacher was quoting stats on how many people don't attend church any longer. I think that contributed to people's feelings that they have to right to express their opinions regardless of who it hurts. Our society has lost the golden rules of be kind to one another and treat others as you want to be treated. It's time to put our kids back in church.

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  32. I love all the quilts in the book, but I do love Orca Bay, it was the first Bonnie Hunter quilt I made, and I fell in love, I also really like Cotton Candy, which I have started, and I love the red and cream one and Roll Roll Cotton Boll....and about 6 others, but those are my favorite.

    My sister wrote her disertation on Bullying for her PHD about 20 years ago. It has always been around, but like alot of other things it was never talked about much. Bullying sent her daughter spiraling. She is and was an extremely beautiful girl, started taking drugs, skipping school, and got into lots of things she never should have. Thank God, with treatment, she was one of the lucky ones. She is still an extremely beautiful young woman, lives not far from you Bonnie, and has her Masters in Psycology. But that kind of stuff, can define who we are, and it is sad, when self worth is sacrificed for someone elses pleasure.

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  33. Wow ... tough request.
    Jamestown Landy
    Pfefferneuse
    Talkin' Turkey
    Orca Bay
    Blue Skies

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  34. Thanks for supporting anti-bullying. While I am lucky enough to say I have not been on the receiving end - I have 'seen' it happen to others and shudder to think people can be so cruel and mean..

    Onto selecting the quilts - I love them all but my most favorites from this book are Pineapple Crazy, Santa Fe String Star, Talkin Turkey, and Jamestown Landing.

    Have a safe trip to PA.

    Carrie
    Delaware

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  35. Talkin' Turkey is my number one FAV!! I'm working on one right now! I'd also take Jamestown Landing, Orca Bay and Pfeffernuesse.

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  36. Bonnie you are such a delight! You abound with energy and giving and have soooo many loyal followers. I love being in your energy and feel it so strongly just reading your blog or enjoying your tutorials. Thank you very much for what you do!
    I agree that bullying is terrible and I agree that no one has the right to be rude or to criticize you on your own blog, but in a way this can be an opportunity for you to overcome this (I say with full support of your feelings). None of us wish to be hurt, or want someone to have that power over us but when it happens, the conflict that arises gives us an opportunity to examine our strong response, to ask why we are feeling 'triggered' and to help us bust through so we are no longer affected by these words. Conflict can be good if it results in growth or movement. I imagine you get so many comments you may never see these words, or if you do, you may think I'm nuts but I felt it necessary to put them down hoping they will be helpful to you in some way. There are techniques to help us 'bust free' of our triggers (and we all have them - part of the human experience.)

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    1. Vicki, can you please give more info on the techniques to "bust free" of the triggers. Maybe a website to check out? it is good to be able to get something positive from something awful while not excusing the awful.(hope that makes sense)

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    2. Hi Sandra, just saw this reply and appreciate the opportunity to pass on information. We all have times when we are 'triggered' or feel uncomfortable because of something that has happened or something someone has said and I have learned that these times are opportunities to exam what is going on here for me, so I can move past this, so this no longer affects me and thus I grow and develop as a person (and take myself out of the victim role). There is a course you can take that is offered world-wide or, there are practitioners who can take you through the process. http://www.bodytalksystem.com/learn/breakthrough/ Hopefully, you can access the link. If not, check www.bodytalksystem.com and look for Breakthrough and/or practitioners. Thanks

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  37. Definitely Jamestown Landing (it's why I bought the book)
    Orca Bay (It's kind of quintessential now, isn't it?)
    Pfefferneuse
    Zuckerwatte

    Thanks for spreading the word on bullying and our new "social situations" where it is so easy to let it happen.

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  38. Great point for thought today.
    Re quilts I would suggest a mix of colour controlled and riotously 'everthing'! How about: Jamestown Landing, RRCB, Charlotte's Baskets and Sante Fe :)

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  39. This is a subject more people should be mindful of. Thanks for posting about it.

    Talkin Turkey
    Orca Bay
    Jamestown Landing
    Pineapple Crazy

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  40. Bonnie, My four quilts would be Jamestown Landing, RRCB, Orca Bay and Pineapple Crazy. It could be that I am biased because I have finished the first three and working on PCrazy right now. Tee Hee. I think instead of promoting the quilts, which are all beautiful, you should promote the directions. They are the best written quilt books of all that I have purchased. There is the written for those that need it written down and the Directions at a Glance for those that don't. Love that!
    Charon in TN

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    1. I mean a giant banner with "Directions at a Glance" behind the quilt.....That would prove that it is a great book!

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  41. Thanks for the words about bullying - that subject is not just for the schoolhouse! My favorites are Blue Skies, Orca Bay, Talking' Turkey and Jamestown Landing

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  42. To pick 4 best is so hard from your new book. Looking through the comments there seems to be a lot of followers "Talkin Turkey". So my list includes it too...
    1) Pineapple Crazy
    2) Talkin Turkey
    3) Jamestown Landing
    4) Pefferunesse
    Select the quilts with different styles and striking colors. Simple construction as well as involved. Good luck with this. Sandi

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  43. After seeing Pineapple Crazy at the VT Quilt Festival, I must say it makes a big impact in person. Definitely bring that one! My other favorites are Jamestown Landing, Orca Bay and Talking' Turkey. But really there's not a bad one in the bunch!

    Applause to Jennifer Livingston for addressing the bully head on! What a great point about children repeating what they see and hear at home.

    Lisa in CT

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  44. Totally agree - we all know our own flaws, each of us has them, we're all human. Let's celebrate the best in each other.
    Have fun picking only 4 quilts!! lol

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  45. Anonymous9:09 PM EDT

    I love talking tip irked. And thank you for sharing the response from Wisconsin. This is what I despised MSN when my girls were young and why I REFUSE to do Facebook. People would never ever have the guts to say these words to a persons face,
    I prefer kind, human contact. And Bonnir, you always provide just that.
    No turkey are you!!!!!!!
    Hugs
    Deb
    Man that should say talkin turkey curse that auto correct!!!!!!!

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  46. We in Canada have also seen this report and this lady is truly amazing.People like the person that wrote this email had better take a step back and look at themselves. Not one of us is perfect and obviously this person is not either.
    I like the Takin Turkey quilt.

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  47. Anonymous9:36 PM EDT

    I have a friend who has been in four different institutions this summer. Not sure if institutions is the right word, rehabs, hospitals, nursing homes.... and I am seeing a subtle "bullying" mentality in the way she is treated at times... sure there are moments when she is vague, but to treat her as vague all the time is cruel and I think it has contributed to her very quick mental decline. Physically the staff are kind, but the other side is starting to concern me. Not just for her, but I will be "there" eventually and will not be able to stand up for myself.

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  48. I am SO proud of this reporter for taking her stand and responding. My grandson was just moved from one school to another because of bullying. Where he loved going to school in K and 1st grade, this year was different. Despite pleas from his parents for this to be addressed, nothing was actually done.
    Since the change on Monday, he is so happy. He doesn't even want to leave school! This change has been a welcome relief.
    No one should have to endure bullying. Bonnie, you are so right that people feel free to say whatever the wish through the cover of email and social websites. They would never have the courage or gumption to say these things to your face, but don't hesitate to type it and send it to you.
    Don't tolerate bulllying. Don't stop complaining and taking a stand until something is done-especially when it's children!

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  49. Talkin Turkey
    Pineapple Crazy
    Pfefferneuse
    Sante Fe String Star
    Tulip Fields
    Blue Skies
    I know that's more than four but those are the ones on the top of my list!! Those Pineapples really are driving me crazy. I have 67 done and a LONG way to go!! I would love the story of this quilt. Did you piece it on the road...if so was it hard to "kit"? Over how long of a period did you piece it?

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  50. Dear Bonnie, I love Pfeffernuesse! best of all. Tulip Fields! and Daylilies! are at 2. position. Pineapple Crazy! is perfect -so many very small pieces and very nice borders and corner stones, but Pineapple is quite common pattern. Do your best.

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  51. ROFL....I suppose if I don't give you my opinion, you won't have any idea which ones to send?? Looks like Talkin' Turkey is going to be one of them! I think it's on almost everyone's list. I would choose just one "two color" quilt...which would be Jamestown Landing or Blue Skies or Talkin Turkey. So one of those....and if you don't sent Talkin Turkey as a two color quilt, then Tulip Fields would be at the top of my list. (I think Talkin Turkey and Tulip Fields are too similar to send them together. I like both, but with so few to send I would choose Tulip Fields because it's soooo beautiful and colorful.) My choices? Blue Skies, RRCB, Tulip Fields, and Wild Child. I think that gives a nice variety of what string quilts can be like. The whole book is beautiful. Doesn't it worry you to send your quilts though?? I would have them call you the minute they arrive safely! Do tell us which ones you choose!

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