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Tuesday, September 04, 2018

With Love and Remembrance

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My little brother Mark slipped peacefully into eternity last night at 9:05pm Pacific time.

No more struggle.  No more suffering.  No more debilitating brain cancer.

I will miss him every minute of every day in every way possible as long as I live.

My heart is ripping into so many pieces. I don't know if I would be able to find them all and even begin to repair a heart that functions.


I will be making arrangements to get to Arizona. My apologies to the guilds I was to visit in September, but family always comes first. We will also pick up those pieces at a later time.


My family and I need this time to gather not only to mourn, but to remember all the good times and to find the way to keep that spark that was Mark alive in each one of us.

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He was such an example to me on how to be happy no matter what.

He never had an angry word to say, he was always the first one there to help anyone with anything – he was a wonderful father to his 5 beautiful children, and grandfather to his beautiful granddaughters.

To say he will be greatly missed is the world’s most absurd understatement one can make.

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He really had a genuine love for others that can not be contained.

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Mark and his son Spencer with daughter-in-law McKenna.

Playing with a round of my Bonnie Hunter playing cards.

(He said it was most appropriate that *I* was the joker.)

He struggled long and hard over the past 5 years since he was first diagnosed with glioblastoma.  

And our family has grown to love each other more through this process.  

You may remember my other 4 brothers jumping in to have their heads shaved in a show of love, support and solidarity when the chemo first took Mark’s hair:


December 28, 2013.

This is how family pulls together.  We pulled together for Mark, and now we pull together to hold each other up so we can hang on and start our new normal without him physically amongst us, but always with us in spirit.

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The three oldest – before the others came along and enriched our family.

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Mark and Sharolyn.

From this moment I am taking life moment by moment.

I know there are orders that have come in during the month of August, and I was planning on starting to send those out today.  I can’t today. 

They will get done.  Thank you for understanding my delay.

As my wonderful friend Jessica told me as only Jessica can – “Those people can wait for their freaking pencils – family is more important!”

Well yes, Jess – since you put it that way.

Yes.  Yes it is.

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Struggling with letting go….





219 comments:

  1. What a heart-wrenching time for you and your family.Sending my thoughts and prayers to you.

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  2. Bonnie, I am so sorry for your loss. Our brothers and sisters are our first best friends. I will keep your family in my prayers.

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  3. Wishing for peace for you and your family

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  4. One of the hardest things to do is to say goodby to someone you love. Those of us who love you totally understand and agree that family comes first. Sending warm hugs and love to you, and prayers for the peace and understanding that can only come from above.

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  5. so sorry for your loss brothers are our first best friends not easy to let them go but your are right no more suffering. take time to be with family and don't worry about anything else. love and hugs

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  7. Oh Bonnie! Much love and many prayers of peace and comfort sent to you and your family. I lost my dad 8yrs ago to the same type of brain cancer. Letting go is a struggle and I truly believe that we don't completely let go. We find a new normal. Big hugs.

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  8. May flights of angels sing him to his rest. I am so sorry for your loss.

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  9. My heart goes out to you in your grief. Here are more hugs as well as prayers.

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  10. Bonnie, I wish you peace and hope that the shared memories will help ease the pain of Mark's passing. Sending you lots of love, warm wishes and lots of hugs.

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  11. As one of those members in one of those guilds, I want to let you know I haven't heard anyone say anything but, "Of course, she needs to be with family." Wishing you a sweet time together with your family.

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  12. Sadly, it’s always harder for those left behind, even though we know our loved one is no longer suffering. Take comfort in your family and remember the wonderful memories. I so enjoyed watching again the video of your brothers shaving their heads in support of Mark. What a good looking bunch of brothers, even without hair. You have a special family... You will find all the pieces of your heart and it will become whole again. Until then, our love and prayers go out to you and your family.

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  13. Deep condolences to you and your family. Mark sounds like the best brother you could have had. May your family experience comfort and healing over these days.

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  14. Arizona is in my heart! Nothing like a Brothers love!! Hugs. Yes, those orders can wait...

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  15. Peace be with you. Know the 1907 lyrics to the song ( original lyrics(} Will the Circle Be Unbroken brought me peace after our family lost part of that circle.

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  16. Sending lot of hugs from SC.

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  17. Having gone through a similar experience, I can say that your heart will heal. Moment by moment is how all of use should live.

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  18. So sorry for your loss, as hard as it is now with the love and support of each other and the sharing of treasured stories you will learn to cope.
    Love prayers and quilty hugs to you and your family

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  19. Bonnie, I'm so sorry. May many happy memories provide comfort to you and to all who loved and were loved by Mark.

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  20. Oh Bonnie, I am in tears right now as I write...you’ve held a special place in my heart since the first time I met you many years ago in Arkansas...my heart is truly breaking for you and your family right now...I shall pray that God will give you comfort during this difficult time right now...the love you have for Mark will NEVER cease...stay strong and travel safe...WE LOVE YOU ��

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  21. So sorry Bonnie. We had a niece that passed several years ago from this. Left two teenage girls. Devastating disease. You and your family are in my prayers.

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  22. Prayers for you and your family. Rest in Peace dear Mark.

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  23. Oh Bonnie, I am so sorry to hear this! I can understand what you are going through because I have been there myself losing my sister to cancer way too early. The best advice I can give you was given to me at that time was If you can't handle life at this time, take it a day at a time, if not a day, then an hour if not an hour then a minute, if not a minute, then you can handle a tick of the clock at a time. It helps to remember just a tick at a time and you will get through. Love you and hope this helps!!!!!

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  24. My deepest sympathies to you and your family.

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  25. Anonymous11:23 AM EDT

    May you family and your precious memories be your strength during this very difficult time. My heart goes out to you and your family with much love . I am so very sorry

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  26. My deepest condolences to you and family for your loss. I will share one of my favorite poems about loss by Mary Oliver: To live in this world

    To Live in this world
    you must be able to do three things:
    To love what is mortal;
    to hold it
    against your bones knowing
    Your own life depends on it;
    And, when the time comes to let
    it go,
    to let it go.

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  27. I’m so, so sorry. I lost my husband to glioblastoma 7 years ago. A terrible disease, as is all cancer.

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  28. Prayers for you and your family. You have been blessed to have this time with Mark. It was a precious gift. Glad you all got to have that. Such a blessing. Take the time with your family, together you all will make it through this time.

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  29. A tender post, Bonnie.
    Prayers are with you and your family, as you gather to mourn your loss and honor a life well lived.
    And yes, pencils can wait!

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  30. Sending love and prayers your way!

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  32. Eternal rest grant unto Mark, O Lord,
    and let perpetual light shine upon him.
    May he rest in peace.

    Prayers and hugs to you and your family.

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  33. Bonnie, so sorry for your family's loss. I will be praying for you in the next several days and weeks. Peace and Blessings to you and your family.

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  34. What a beautiful tribute. There are no words to express the deep heartfelt sympathy I feel for you at this time. You will find peace in clinging on to the memories and bonding that will take place as time marches forward. A flood of feelings have overtaken my heart as I am reflecting on the loss of a brother and only sister to cancer. I know you will cherish each memory and strive to make more with the family left behind. May God bless you and your family in your efforts to move forward in a time that you knew was coming but still is remarkably difficult to see come to a reality. Love and thoughts to you and the family as you gather to celebrate a remarkable life and battle well fought.

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  35. I wish you and your family strength to deal with the loss of your Brother

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  36. Hope you all will be comforted by being together. Yes, family comes first, go be together and celebrate what was wonderful and mourn your loss, and then find a way to live life in a way that would make your brother happy!

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  37. Thinking of you and your family. Lost my brother to this horrible disease also. Someday, there will be a cure. At least you know he's always with you..

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  38. Sending love and sympathy along with hugs. I’m so happy you are able to go to be with your family. So sorry for your loss.😢

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  39. Sending love and prayers for you and your family.

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  40. Praying for peace and comfort for you and your family.

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  41. https://llerrah.com/memories.htm
    There are no words to express at the passing of a loved one, no matter how hard we try. The link is to a poem that brings me comfort, I hope it will you as well. Prayers and blessings for strength during this time of sadness in your family. Rest In Peace, Mark, you are ❤️

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  43. So sorry to hear of your loss Bonnie. Many prayers for you and your family.

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  44. My deepest condolences. So sorry. Prayers for you and your family. Such a hard time within a family.

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  45. My deepest sympathy to you and your family as your hearts ache and tears flow. I will continue to pray for all of you as you support one another while remembering Mark as only your family can.

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  46. Very sorry Bonnie! Prayers & hugs

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  47. So sorry for your loss, Bonnie......I lost my "baby" brother to lung cancer 7 years ago and I miss him every day. Love and hugs to you.

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  48. My deepest condolences to you and your family. Take this time to spend with family which in the end is the only thing that is important. It will be a time of sadness in letting go and a time of joy in remembrance and bringing together closer bonds of those left behind.

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  49. I am so sorry for your loss Bonnie. Love and hugs.....

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  50. With sincerest condolences.

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  51. May his memory be eternal.

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  52. My heart bleeds for you and your family. To heck with orders, take your time to get back in your Grove. The rest will get done eventually. No hurry.

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  53. So very sorry for you and all the family.
    Jessica is right.

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  54. Glad you spent some quality time together a couple of weeks ago. You're lucky to have a big wonderful family. Take some time off and take care of yourself.

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  55. Love and support are what family and friends are all about. You have both from all of us too. Prayers for you and your family are being whispered. Families Are Forever.

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  56. My sincerest sympathy to you and your family. My thoughts are with you.
    Liz.

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  57. So sorry for your lost Bonnie - yes workshops and orders can wait - Family is so much more important. Hugs as you adjust to your new normal. Take as much time as you need.

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  58. My deepest sympathy Bonnie to you and your family. Sending lots of thoughts and prayers. Take as much time as needed for yourself and family - they are your base and foundation. Do take care of yourself.

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  59. Oh Bonnie, my heart is breaking for you. Take all the time you need to start to heal. Much love and prayers to you and your family.

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  60. I'm so so very sorry. I lost my hubby to glio in March.
    My heart goes out to your family.

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  61. I'm so sorry for your loss Bonnie. Take the time you need, everything else can wait. Don't rush yourself. I lost my little brother almost 20 years ago and it takes a while to heal.

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  62. I am so very sorry, Bonnie. May he rest in peace.

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  63. So sorry for you and all your family. Lots of love, Inger

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  64. my heart is with you as you mourn your brother's passing.

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  65. Praying for you and your family as you navigate this deep, rocky valley. I am so very sorry for your deep loss...something you just get through, not "over". Know that we will be here for you, no matter what you need, we will do our very best to supply it. Allow your wounded, shattered heart to be filled with the love of your family, friends and quilting buddies all over the world, as we wrap our arms around you in our hearts and minds.

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  66. I'm so sorry for your loss, Bonnie. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I lost my little brother three years ago to cancer. No one needs you to do anything except go to your family now and take care of yourself. Sending love to you.

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  67. Bonnie, your description of your brother fits my dad to perfection, and I still miss him every day. Sometimes with a chuckle, sometimes with a tear or two. It takes time, but you will come to peace with his absence. You are, after all, the expert at putting pieces together. What better subject than your shattered heart? Just keep stitching. We who so love and appreciate what you do will be encouraging you along the way.

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  68. I'm so sorry for your loss. Prayers for comfort for you and all your family in the days and weeks ahead.

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  69. Yes - family comes first always!! My deepest sympathies.

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  70. My heart aches for you. My thoughts and prayers are with you during this very difficult time. Just know we support you. Blessings.

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  71. My deepest sympathy. Yes, family comes first. In the end they're what matters.

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  72. I'm so sorry for your loss. Family is so important. Don't worry about those pencils. Go, be with family, mourn, remember, and take care of yourself.

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  73. I am so very sorry.

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  74. I am so sorry. Love and prayers to you and your family.

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  75. So sorry for yoir loss, thinking of you at this very sad time.

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  76. So sorry for your loss, family is always first and last and the hardest to let go of, sending hugs and prayers.

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  77. Bonnie, my deepest sympathies to you and your family. My guess is that you were with hubby when you got the news and I'm so glad you weren't alone. 8 years ago next Tuesday my mother-in-law died from the same Dreadful disease. 3 years later my husband passed away. And three years after that his brother died. Last year I lost my stepdad of nearly 40 years and a dear aunt. I agree with Annie V, you never forget them, you have a new normal. I will be praying for you in the days, and months ahead as you work through your grief.

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  78. I'm so sorry. Take the time you need to heal and be with your family. Prayers.

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  79. Prayers. I just lost my Mom suddenly in May--still trying to grieve. Takes time.

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  80. Thoughts and prayers with you and your family. You will see his smile every time you smile in the mirror looking back at you!

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  81. So touched by your love of life and family. Very sorry for your loss. I have no words for anguish and heart ache. Love you Bonnie.

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  82. Hugs to you Bonnie. I'm so very sorry Mark left this earth so early. May you all find peace in being back together in these first moments of grief and to share the joy of Mark's life. I have buried much family far too young. There is no right way or wrong way to grieve and heal. It's your journey. Peace be with you and safe travels to AZ to begin the healing process.

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  83. As someone who has also lost a sibling, it is extremely difficult and my heart is with you and your family. My brother died in a horrific car accident, but our family definitely grew closer. It will be 5 years in October. Thank you for all you do for the quilting world. My deepest condolences.
    Sharon in Colorado

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  84. Prayers for you and your family as you travel back to AZ with a heavy heart. No good time to get bad news but at least you were home and not on the road.

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  85. Bonnie, I am so very sorry for your loss. Prayers for you and your family at this time.

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  86. I am so very sorry for your loss Bonnie.

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  87. Prayers for you and your family!
    Hugs and love
    Vicki

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  88. Cancer sucks.
    I am so very sorry that you hurt. I am praying for you and your family. Big warm hugs for all of you!!

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  89. So sorry for your loss :( Your heart will battle the relief you feel that his suffering is over, and the aching that you feel because you miss him so. Take care of yourself and your family-that is your #1 priority.

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  90. My deepest sympathy on the loss of your brother. His struggle was strong and he lived the best he could, for the longest that he could. He will always be cherished by those who loved him.

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  91. My deepsest sympathy on the loss of your brother. It is hard whether it is a sudden, unexpected death or knowing that it is going to happen. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

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  92. Godspeed Mark.
    Blessings to you, Bonnie, and your family.

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  93. So sorry, Bonnie. Don't forget to take care of you.

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  94. Hugs, thoughts, prayers and you are loved by many.

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  95. Dear Bonnie, I am so sorry to hear about Mark. The Bible says to be absent from the earth is to be present with the Lord. Mark would not want you to be sad for too long, he is in heaven and safe now, no more tears, or pain. God bless you and your family and this time, my thoughts and prayers go out to you. God bless Regards Mandy xx

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  96. All of us with the Forsyth Piecers and Quilters Guild and the Durham-Orange County Quilters Guild send our love and understanding to you and send prayers to uplift your spirits.

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  97. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your beautiful family. May God lift you up with peace and comfort.

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  98. So very sorry for your loss. I lost a brother one year ago—it is so hard. Not a day goes by that we don’t think of him. Prayers for you and your family.��������

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  99. My sister left us a little over a year ago after years of struggle with medical issues . She was 48. It does get easier, slowly but it does. Today would have been her birthday and it’s harder to keep going on those special days. Heartfelt condolences to you and your family in this difficult time.
    Love and hugs

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  100. So sorry to hear of your brother passing. I can't imagine the pain of losing a sibling. Go be with family and hold onto each other a little longer. God bless all of you.

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  101. I am so sorry, Bonnie, for your loss. Be comforted knowing that his struggles and pain are gone; that you had good days to remember the good times and make some new memories. Be sure to take all the time that you need to put your heart back together...anyone who doesn’t understand will not be a loss. God bless you and your family in this time of mourning.

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  102. So sorry! Prayers to you and your whole family. Go and spend time and the quilting will be going when it is time. Hugs to you!
    Love

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  103. Hugs and prayers to you, your parents, and your entire family. Such a terrible loss.
    My brother died 5 years ago so I understand the agony.
    Feel free to shut down all commitments and activities until further notice.
    You'll know when you're ready to resume when the grief doesn't feel like it's choking you all the time.

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  104. I am so very sorry for your loss, Bonnie. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your entire family!

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  105. Bonnie - I’m so, so sorry for your loss. Holding you in my thoughts. Please no worries or apologies for cancellations or delayed shipments. Your energies and focus need to be with yourself and your family for as long as you need. In the unlikely event you receive a complaint, delete it!

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  106. My heart goes out to you Bonnie. I know how you feel as I have lost my two older brothers. Please take care

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  107. Losing family is hard. Lost my mom 2.5 yrs ago. And you're right. You will adapt to the new normal. Take all the time you need to grieve. We can all wait for freaking pencils. Sending quilterly love.

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  108. My heartfelt sympathies. Words cannot express what you are going through. Take 1 day at a time.
    Hugs

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  109. Sending heartfelt condolences to you and your family. May your brother rest in peace.

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  110. My heart is breaking for you, Bonnie. I’m so sorry. 💔💔😢😢💔💔

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  111. I'am so sorry for you loss sending praying for you and your family ❤❤����❤❤

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  112. So very sorry to hear this news. Prayers for the family and especially to your Mom and Dad. Losing your child is the worst thing a parent can experience.

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  113. I am so very sorry for your loss. I am happy that you had such an amazing brother and have wonderful memories of him. You are in my prayers.

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  114. Sending my deepest condolences and prayers for the loss of your precious Mark. I hope you will take time to grieve his passing and celebrate his life as you spend time with your family. At times like this, we call it "circling the wagons". All things (and folks) pertaining to this bloggy part of your life can just chill. Hugs from New Mexico.

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  115. My heart goes out to you and your family, Bonnie. Anyone who has experienced a loss like this understands the ache you feel and the need to surround yourself with family to support each other through the pain and sorrow. Best wishes.

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  116. Blessings to you and all the family. I feel as though I have also lost your Mark; you made him a part of my life, too.

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  117. Deepest condolences to you and your family today and going forward.

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  118. I don't know how you feel, learning of your brothers passing is sad for me, I can not imagine for you his family and your extended family
    I am sorry for all of you

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  119. I was just thinking about your brother the other day. Wondering how he was doing? We all feel so saddened for your loss. Now Mark is free from all the things cancer brings. You will have him with you always. Hugs and prayers to your family.

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  120. So sorry for your loss Bonnie, your family will be in my thoughts ❤️❤️❤️

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  121. It is so difficult to lose someone that you love so dearly. I could only cry during the video of all of your brothers cutting their hair in solidarity for their brother during his time for his chemo. The music was also so fitting. Peace will come at some time for you and your family but just know that many of us hold you all in our hearts. Prayers, peace and blessings.

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  122. My thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

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  123. I'm so sorry for your & your family's loss. Our family has lost too many to cancer, but the good memories live on and so will your family's good memories of Mark.

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  124. Orders can wait! You are in my prayers!

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  125. You and your family are in our thoughts and prayers! May they help bring peace and healing.

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  126. So sorry for your lost, praying for you and your family!

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  127. Praying for your comfort at this time.

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  128. Even when we are lucky enough to know the end is nigh. Nothing prepares for the emptiness does it. You each have your special memories of Mark, hold them close and each other now. Thinking of you and yes we can wait for our freaking pencils....God Bless xxxx

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  129. Mi dispiace tanto Bonnie, ho seguito il percorso di malattia di tuo fratello...dirò una preghiera x lui e x tutti voi.....un abbraccio forte

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  130. My thoughts are with you and your family. After giving so much of your self to so many, through your blog, teaching and books, you need to give yourself time.
    Have a blog rest. Enjoy your family time, and celebrate and mourn.
    We will all be here for you when you are ready.
    Thankyou for being you.

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  131. Peace to you and your family, Bonnie!

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  132. Bonnie, may the creator of the universe comfort you among all the mourners, for all that there is to mourn. it's kind of like a huge hole in the middle of your life, eventually we learn to walk around it without falling in, but it takes time. we, [all your cheering section followers], are here, with you, waiting for you whenever you're ready.

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  133. So, so very sorry for your loss. Peace and prayers to you and your family!

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  134. Bonnie, you don't have to let go of Mark. He will always live in your heart and always be with you. Wishing you peace, hugs and prayers.

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  135. Sending hugs. So sorry for your loss.

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  136. So sorry for your loss. Prayers for comfort during this journey.

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  137. What a beautiful smile Mark had. So glad you'll be with your family, where the stories of happy times will step forward, taking their place ahead of the memories of more difficult days. Eventually, that's the way it will be, naturally. The happy memories prevail, but it takes time.
    Know that loving thoughts are with you and the family.

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  138. I'm so sorry for your loss and what you're going thru . My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family .

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  139. So sorry for your loss of your so much loved brother. Big hugs for you and your family. Please take your time, I bet we all can wait a bit for our orders and your attention!

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  140. So sorry to hear of the loss of your brother Bonnie. Sincere condolences to all the family.xx

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  141. Prayer's Bonnie, for you and your family. May he rest in peace. I lost my brother in 2009 there are no words.

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  142. I am so deeply sorry for the loss of Mark. My heart hurts for you and your family. Cling to each other in loving remembrance of such a wonderful brother, son, husband, father and grandfather that he was during his journey here on earth. He will always be with you. (((((Hugs)))))

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  143. I’m so sorry for your loss. Prayers of strength and courage for you and your family during this trying time. Sending y’all much love and hugs. As you celebrate Mark’s life journey, may you each find him living on within yourselves. Love and prayers,Sandi

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  144. I'm so sorry for your loss, prayers to you and your family.

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  145. My deepest sympathies to you and the family. xxx

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  146. Rest in peace Mark. All my love to you and your family.

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  147. I am so sorry for your loss, Bonnie. Spend the time with your family and share the memories, celebrate his life. Prayers for you all.

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  148. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. And from all those little pieces that your heart is being ripped into, there will come a beautiful quilt of love that you will treasure.

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  149. I'm so sorry to hear Mark has passed away - will be keeping you and your family in prayer.

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  150. Yes, Bonnie, Family should always come first. They are the precious people who helped us to become the people that we are today. My prayers are wigh uou and yours thru the next week of hard times. Take care of yourself.

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  151. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. As I tell my mom, Family always come before Quilting. We understand. Take care of yourself and your family. May the wonderful memories ease the pain just a little bite.

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  152. My deepest condolences for the loss of your brother, Mark.Family is so important.Everything else can wait.

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  153. So sorry for your loss. Condolences to you all. How sweet to have each other to lean on and celebrate his life.

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  154. So sorry for your loss. I lost my little brother almost 3 years ago. For a long time after he passed I felt like my heart had shattered into a million pieces and try as I might I couldn't tape it (or sew it) back together. Now I feel like I have put it all back together & there is just a small part of it missing. For me it helped to talk about him, not just let it be the elephant in the room that no one wants to say anything about because they might upset someone.

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  155. My truest condolences at this sad time. Prayers that you find peace about this loss and -- in time -- smiles and happiness as you visit memories of life with your beloved brother.

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  156. So very sorry for your loss. Hugs to you and your family.

    And, Yes, your friend Jessica is so very correct. Family comes first. 💕

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  157. My heart aches with you at this time. May God give you comfort & peace. Much love to all of you.

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  158. I am so sorry for your loss. Hold tight to your memories and don't forget that there is a world full of quilters holding you in their thoughts and prayers.

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  159. Bonnie, so very sorry for your loss. I have no siblings so can't imagine what you are going through. I will say, you are very lucky, even now to have had all the joy, fun, laughter for your lifetime to shore you up at this time. Hugs of care to each of your family, especially to your mom & dad, the most tragic ones left behind. God's blessings for each moment as you all move forward.

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  160. I am so sorry for your loss. It is a great tribute to Mark and I know he will be missed by everyone who knew him. He is in a better place and no longer hurts. Blessings to all of your family.

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  161. My heart goes out to you and your family. Hold your memories close. I know where your heart is as I have lost 3 brothers. Stay strong.

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  162. Thinking of you Bonnie. Take all the time you need. Life is just not fair. Hugs.

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  163. My heart is breaking for you Bonnie. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers at this very difficult time.

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  164. So very sorry for your loss. Hugs and love to you and your family.

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  165. So sorry for your loss! You have great memories that will keep him alive in spirit:) Sending big hugs and prayers!

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  166. My prayers are with you and your family. He will continue to be with you as you share the stories of life with him throughout your life.

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  167. My deepest sympathies to you and your family.

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  168. So sorry for your loss. Praying for you and your family! He will continue to be there with you!

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  169. Prayers to you and your family. He fought hard and now he can rest. I read somewhere
    No one truly dies as long as they livie in the hearts of those who loved them. God bless you all.

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  170. My deepest sympathy to you and to your family.

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  171. I ache for you and your family. I've been where you are and understand the pain.
    My sister died 3 years ago at age 68...I miss her every day and think about all of the fun times we had together. However, her memories live on within me and the hole in my heart will never heal, but always be a reminder of how much she was loved. "Let the tears come, let them water your soul" was written on a card I received at the time.

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  172. Deepest sympathy, Bonnie! No words can do justice....
    Sending healing thoughts, love and peace to you and your family.

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  173. My heart aches for you. I lost my brother when he was 19 and I was 22. You are right. Your brother will always be with you! Continue to love and cherish him. Blessings and peace to you.

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  174. My heart hurts for you, Bonnie. I'm so, so sorry for your loss. Take your time. Grief does what grief does, when it wants to. Take care of yourself and be with your family.

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  175. I'm so very sorry for your loss. My sincere condolences to you and your family, to Mark's wife and children. God Bless you all and Godspeed to your brother on his journey home. May he always live in your hearts and memories.

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  176. Oh, Bonnie. Brothers are the best... can't begin to imagine your pain. May God bless and comfort you and your family.

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  177. Hugs and love to you and your family. I am so sorry. Having lost my only sister to cancel I understand what is going on in your heart. May God enfold you in his arms as you go through this time of sorrow. Remember him with joy in your heart for the time you did have.

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  178. Sending peace and love your way. xoxox

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  179. Thank-you for sharing your beautiful words during this this unimaginable time. I called my brother and regret that this was the nudge I needed.

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  180. Dear Bonnie, as I read your post and look at the pictures, I am hurting for you and with you. I pray for you and your family, and for Mark's family. I promise you the hole you now feel in your heart will heal, will once again be filled with all the memories of sweet times you shared with Mark. I lost a wonderful brother, Cliff, who meant so much more to me than I can express. Cliff is one of five brothers I have. He and I talked on the phone every week, (I in AZ and Cliff in NY) and he never ceased to make me laugh. I thought my heart would never heal when Cliff left us, but in time I found my self remembering so many of the special times we shared, the fun times we shared, the times he held me up when my life was heading downward. I now feel the hole in my heart filled with all the love he showered on me and the way he never let me down. The video you shared of your brothers all getting their heads shaved made me smile and cry at the same time. Condolences and prayers to you and your family. Sharon Luedeman, cv quilter

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  181. You never have to let go of a loved one, even if they have moved on without us, we just have to hold them close in a different way. Prayers and Blessings to you and yours Bonnie. Grief is a never ending process, it never goes away but it does get different.

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  182. Dear Bonnie, I am so sorry to hear about your brother and my heart breaks for you and your family. Sending prayers and hugs your way. You have such a way with words and even though I am very sad, I am also comforted with your words. Much love.

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  183. Oh Bonnie, my heart breaks for you. I understand the pain you are going through and the need to be with family right now. I lost my husband Friday the 13th of July this year and found out my older brother had bladder cancer 3 weeks before that that has spread to his spine, lung and liver. Right now he is in the hospital again with pneumonia. Family helps you get through this along with faith in the lord. My prayers are with you and your family as you struggle with this loss.

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  184. Deepest sympathies on the loss of your brother. I love the quilt saying, so true

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  185. So sorry for the loss of your brother. All the best to you and your family during this difficult time.

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  186. Deepest sympathy for you all - will be praying for God's comfort for all of brothers family and friends.

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  187. Dear Bonnie, unfortunately I know your pain. My lovely younger brother passed suddenly 2 years ago in his early 50's, and all I wanted was to be with my family.
    Thinking of you all at this heart-wrenching time

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  188. Hugs and prayers to you and yours and everyone here who is suffering from their losses.

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  189. Dear Bonnie and family, so very sorry for your loss, may you all find comfort together and in remembering the happy times, sending love. x

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  190. Very sad news, such a hard time for you and the family, especially Mark's wife, children and grandchildren. For Mark: peace after so many struggles. God bless you all.

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  191. Bonnie,

    No words can ease your pain. I have prayed for all of you during the last few years and I know how strong family is. My heart goes out to all of you at this time. I respect your time and appreciate all you have done for so many and if there is anything I can do for you do not hesitate to email me. May all the happy and wonderful strong moments you have ever had help all of you at this most difficult time.

    With my deepest condolences,
    Patty Bertrand

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  192. It has all been said sweetheart, I can add nothing but that my heart aches along with yours and your family.

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  193. No words...sending love and prayers.

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  194. Prayers and tears and a long distance hug.

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  195. Sympathy and prayers for you and your family.

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