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Tuesday, September 04, 2018

With Love and Remembrance

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My little brother Mark slipped peacefully into eternity last night at 9:05pm Pacific time.

No more struggle.  No more suffering.  No more debilitating brain cancer.

I will miss him every minute of every day in every way possible as long as I live.

My heart is ripping into so many pieces. I don't know if I would be able to find them all and even begin to repair a heart that functions.


I will be making arrangements to get to Arizona. My apologies to the guilds I was to visit in September, but family always comes first. We will also pick up those pieces at a later time.


My family and I need this time to gather not only to mourn, but to remember all the good times and to find the way to keep that spark that was Mark alive in each one of us.

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He was such an example to me on how to be happy no matter what.

He never had an angry word to say, he was always the first one there to help anyone with anything – he was a wonderful father to his 5 beautiful children, and grandfather to his beautiful granddaughters.

To say he will be greatly missed is the world’s most absurd understatement one can make.

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He really had a genuine love for others that can not be contained.

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Mark and his son Spencer with daughter-in-law McKenna.

Playing with a round of my Bonnie Hunter playing cards.

(He said it was most appropriate that *I* was the joker.)

He struggled long and hard over the past 5 years since he was first diagnosed with glioblastoma.  

And our family has grown to love each other more through this process.  

You may remember my other 4 brothers jumping in to have their heads shaved in a show of love, support and solidarity when the chemo first took Mark’s hair:


December 28, 2013.

This is how family pulls together.  We pulled together for Mark, and now we pull together to hold each other up so we can hang on and start our new normal without him physically amongst us, but always with us in spirit.

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The three oldest – before the others came along and enriched our family.

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Mark and Sharolyn.

From this moment I am taking life moment by moment.

I know there are orders that have come in during the month of August, and I was planning on starting to send those out today.  I can’t today. 

They will get done.  Thank you for understanding my delay.

As my wonderful friend Jessica told me as only Jessica can – “Those people can wait for their freaking pencils – family is more important!”

Well yes, Jess – since you put it that way.

Yes.  Yes it is.

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Struggling with letting go….





219 comments:

«Oldest   ‹Older   201 – 219 of 219
Agneta quilts said...

So so sad to hear your loss, we have read so much about the love you have - not had!) for your brother. Mourning takes time and tears, but you will eventually be able to think about him without tears rising. But right now there is no need to be strong. We all understand if you don"t feel up to blogging or if there will be delays in sending out stuff. Sending you thoughts of comfort.

Beth said...

Hearts and Love to you and your family, Bonnie! Your choice of quilt at the end of your message shows your deep-seated wrenching and torture. May God bless you all.

Donna Endresen said...

My Dear Bonnie- My heart and prayers pour out for you and your family during this time of sorrow. Yes, orders can wait. I do not have mine in yet, as time keeps getting away from me, in due time. Take the time you need, many of us have walked the path you are now facing. Hopefully we each have empathy knowing somewhat what you are going through. May God Bless you always. You do so much for us and the quilting world!

Donna
Kasilof, AK
Where fall is sneaking up on us at night, even though we have beautiful sunny days.

Karen Gail said...

Oh, Bonnie! Having lost my own "big brother" I know that one of the hardest things to do is to say goodby to someone you love. Of course family comes first. Sending warm hugs and love to you, and prayers for the peace and understanding that can only come from above. Karen Sebor Chardon, OHIO


Karen Gail said...
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Mary Ann said...

Sympathy to you and all your family.....survivor972002@midco.net

Ann said...

Angels flying too help with hugs and prayers

tnquiltz said...

So sorry for the loss of your brother. My condolences to you & your family at this difficult time. Hugs & much love. (((())))

Unknown said...

Sending prayers to you and your whole family. May he rest in eternal peace now.There will be no more pain for him. Just rejoice in all of your endearing memories.

Pam said...

Bonnie, it is a heart wrenching time and I am so sorry for you and your family. Prayers for peach and love filling your hearts, for memories shared and a time for healing. Life will be different now. Just don't deny those moments when something unexpected tears your eyes and stings in your heart - that is the love you have for Mark. Much love~

45th Parallel Quilter said...

I read this post with tears in my eyes. Family IS the most important thing. Take care of yourself, take care of them and God bless you all. Linda

Donna said...

So sorry for your loss, my prayers are with you and your family

Kerry Grace said...

Sending you a wish for healing and peace, don't even worry about the freaking pencils.

Els Duyts said...

so sorry for your loss! wishing you and your family a lot of strenght in the coming time. You're in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs

ALICIA said...

Mi mas sentido pésame, junto con oraciones y abrazos. Mucha fuerza

Sherrill said...

So sorry for your loss. My DH, Frank, passed away 6 yrs ago on Aug. 11 from the same horrible brain tumor. He only made it one year after diagnosis (which is the more normal expectancy after); Mark really did fight LONG!! Pray for healing for all left behind.

Sandy/Mom/Granny said...

I'm so sorry for your loss! Family is so much more important than things. May you all comfort each other.

FYRKRKR said...

My heart and tears are with you, Bonnie! As a cancer survivor I know how hard it is on all of the loved ones You were lucky to have each other. Gayle

Grieve not, nor speak of me with tears, but laugh and talk as if I were beside you. I loved you so, t'was Heaven here with you.
- Isla Paschal Richardson

HRH-DMK said...

Bonnie, I am very sorry for the loss of your brother Mark, for you and your entire family. My thoughts and prayers are with you all. Be joyful your family are so close, and that you will hold each other up with support and memories (I fear the same won't be true for me, as not all families are that supportive. Some relationships shatter after such tragedy. But I am truly encouraged for you that yours will be strong in solidarity of supporting each other through your heartbreaking tragedy. Mark awaits you in heaven, of this I am sure). ~Diana

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