One year it was a gas clothes dryer.Yes, we needed a dryer, but why does that make a good Christmas gift for me?? Doesn't the clothes dryer service the whole family?? Something that epitomizes WORK to a woman just does not make a good personal gift. From that point on it was a rule that small appliances, vacuums, cleaning things, even cooking things (no toaster, no sandwhich maker, no fryer)were only okay to give on non-holidays.
This slipped his mind a couple years ago when for my birthday he brought home...unwrapped in a CVS pharmacy bag with the receipt in it no less...one of those "as seen on tv" pasta pots, the kind with holes in the lids for draining. Two pots actually, you got a bonus small one for free :c| cheap aluminium, the first time he used it (I have yet to use it) the paint started coming off the outside. This was NOT a good birthday.
I ranted and raved privately on this birthday, I was so frustrated.....I whined all over a small quilter's email list I am on, and for my birthday, they ALL sent me pasta recipes with the heading of "put THIS in your (*&@#& pasta pot!". It was too hilarious and made a difficult moment much better.
So now....DH is nearly afraid to try anything without getting the okay from me first, and that is hard, because I can't usually think of anything off the top of my head what I want. It takes the suprise out of it, you know?
The same thing happened the other night..."What do you want for Valentine's Day?" *shaking head* (this is after...what? a month of jewelry commercials on tv??)
So yesterday I go into the clinic to help work the front desk and see if I get any walk in massage appts. (I sold a couple gift certificates and those will be my new clients, so this is a good start!) and this little old black man is going door to door offering on-site car detailing while you wait. BINGO! My car has not been detailed since I bought it 3 years ago. I try to keep it clean, but as far as really getting in there and detailing it.....who has time for that?
So I called up DH and said....I know what you are getting me for Valentine's Day....My car detailed! *hehe*
He did a great job too! He spent 4 1/2 hours working on cleaning and detailing my car! Wow. It was SO GREAT. So even though there was no imagination to it on DH's part, I am tickled with my car and the mobile detailing guy. I think it's something I'd recommend to other women out there who don't know what to give their DHs for valentine's or for their birthdays or for father's day etc....who would have thought..car detailing?!
I'm thinking that while sitting at the clinic in between appts is going to be a good time to take some UFO handwork project to work on. Maybe my hexagons...it's a small project? It has set untouched for probably...2 years? I just need to throw it in the car so I'll have it with me....
Bonnie
13 comments:
Bonnie - Sounds like we have the same DH. I have received a stove, washing machine and dryer as gifts. Last year for Christmas I received an electric heater. That was it. I threw a fit! This year I received what I asked for! To have a partner who is spontaneous would be wonderful!
Oh Bonnie, Your DH is exactly like mine. Only this year he surprised me with an old quilt. I cried-was it the shock of the gift or the gift itself, I don't know. Usually he takes me shopping and I pick out my own gift.
Love your hexagon quilt. Inspires me to finish the applique on my tumbling blocks.
At least he was thinking of you. I have a very sweet DH but he definitely has his faults. Thoughts of gifts other than Christmas and birthday don't even occur to him. I wished him a Happy Valentine's Day when he got up yesterday morning and his reply was "oh, I guess it is Valentines, isn't it." That was it. I need nothing big or fancy - just a token acknowlegement. He received his when he got home from work - I had a heart balloon and M&M's waiting for him by the door. He came down the hall and didn't even say a word. You know - I think I should tell him how that made me feel - he probably wouldn't figure it out otherwise.
Bonnie, yup, I get nothing also - zero - zip. My husband thinks all holidays are made up by hallmark to sell cards. So I've come to expect zippo. Oh all right, I do get a xmas gift usually, but that is it. MEN.
I love your hexagon quilt. I've got little freezer paper pieces to make a mini-one like Lucy is doing. Picked it up last fall at the Madison quilt expo - have I touched it? NO.
Geesh...I thought I had the only husband like that...got tired of hearing all the lovely gifts my friends got. I get nothing unless I spell something out...definitely takes the fun out of things!
I love the hexagons project...I did one here in Ireland with a group of older ladies in a crafting club when I first arrived...it introduced me to English paper piecing. My first handwork quilting project...now I've finished my hand pieced DJ and am looking around for a good portable project again!...
It must be a genetic DH thing as my Dh is the same so I buy myself gifts for birthdays and Xmas and he's happy with that and so am I. I'm in a internet quilters' Xmas swap so I get surprise quilty gifts as well. It works for me! Also love the hexagons quilt.
Hugs
My DH is exactly the same - 3 years in a row I got a 20 piece dinner set for christmas because he couldn't think of anything AARGGJHHH!! I mean, how hard is it to get a gift certificate from the LQS or some nice smellies, or a massage or a facial or a beautiful tree to plant or a weekend away etc. The hexagons are stunning! I love the colours.
For my birthday one year I told DH repeatedly that I needed a new handbag. I'm not fussy, anything would have done. Instead I got a purple leather key ring with a built-in bottle opener. I was speechless when he said, "But a bottle opener is so useful..." To him, not me!
Am I wrong to think the only appropriate gift for Valentine's Day is flowers and kind words? The only gift for Mother's Day should be white flowers. I'm so sick of being schooled by the TV to expect massive gifts on these days. Isn't it about love and appreciation? I guess I'm over the whole gift giving thing entirely.
I have an almost identical hexagon project started too. I call it my 60 year project; I don't intend to rush it... It's 15 years old already
I think having your car detailed was a great gift idea. I start about a month before any given holiday and lay hints, or just say " would love that" Nothing subtle in that but it works.
I just buy what I like - he gets the hard job of "wrapping" things in the gift bags. I usually have something of a list going as well of things I'd like so that it can be a surprise which one he'll pick. We just skip Valentine's Day tho...
I love your hexagon quilt--hmm, gives me food for thought! I "need" another project! LOL But I just love doing those hexagons. I'm making a quilt that has the flowers out of the hexagons, and I was so sad when I finished my last one. They are so soothing and comforting to do for some reason. I guess because I'm hand piecing my DJ and the hexagons are a LOT easier to do! :)
OK - I can see it now - a design wall in the massage clinic! LOL! You have to make sure to keep a cover on top of it thought when clients are in - it might be too stimulating! LOL!
One year after another fleece jacket or vest I said to him (now ex) "look. I have ENOUGH fleece. That's what YOU want. I think you've known me long enough to know what interests me. If you're going to get me a gift it should be for ME not YOU."
that actually worked. the best present he ever got me was the year he figured out a way to get me the big coffee table book about the Esprit Amish quilts. He was injured and unable to drive and figured out a way to order it and got a co-worker to drive him over to pick it up and wrapped it nicely.
If you don't tell them what the problem is, the situation won't change.
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